What Happens When You Get Your Life Back--For This, I Am Grateful
This fall I’ve been privileged to teach a fair number of Road Next Taken classes. I’m always overwhelmed when in the space of a one time, 1 1/2 hour class, participants not infrequently crack open the window into their soul and share what’s there.
For the majority, retirement is simultaneously wonderful and frightening. They’re uncertain about what they also feel certain about. Surprised that tomorrow can be challenging in ways they never imagined. So happy that they don’t have to go to work in the morning while wondering what this day...and the next...and the next might be.
Like me.
Like me, they wanted their lives back; they got them; and now what? What does happen when you get your life back?
Like me, they wanted their lives back; they got them; and now what? What does happen when you get your life back?
Is it handed to you on the metaphorical silver platter? Or do you have to rummage around in the kitchen drawer to find it?
Is it what you expected, anticipated, planned for or does it end up being none of the above?
These are among the wonderings I see people wrestling with.
Like me.
Like me.
Like me, I believe they want to have control, freedom to make choices that will populate the life they get back when they retire. They want to say no as much as they say yes without feeling judged or written off. They want to live each day with a purpose; some days, big purpose, other days, the spark of a purpose.
There is the surprise, I'm thinking, that the life you get back can often be filled with first world stressors. Once your children were grown, gone, launched, returned and finally at least somewhat launched, the stress of the final phase of parenthood--departure--was lifted, although many have shared with me that it is difficult nigh impossible to not continue to worry about your adult children and the decisions they are making or not making and they lives they are leading and then, adding to the mix if you are so blessed, those ever amazing and wonderful and beautiful grandchildren. Because once they are on their own, the significant source of stress in your life frequently is your job. So when you retire and get your life back, there just shouldn't be any stress since you left it behind when you turned out the office lights and closed the door. Right?
Um, not so much. That's just not realistic. That's just not life, even the life you get back which, I'll poke you with this reminder, is what you wanted.
Like me.
Like me, this life is and isn't so many things. And for that I am grateful. I am grateful that each day, should I make the choice, opportunities present themselves for me to grow and embrace new learning. Each choice filled day can either nudge me forward or gently ease me into my chair in the family room. I am grateful for the family and friends, those connections which ask me to brave the wilderness, as Brene Brown says. Who remind me of the importance of integrity and authenticity. Who offer ways I might not have otherwise imagined to live my faith, to be the hands and feet and voice of Christ in the world. I am grateful for the smallest things that populate my day to day. A beautiful sunset. The convention of cardinals accompanied by the flock of robins in my daughter's backyard yesterday, shared with my granddaughter, teaching her that cardinals were people who love us who are gone and come back to see us, so say, hi, great grandma! Hi, great grandpa! Thank you for watching over us! And then seeing her return to the window to say Hi, birdies! I am grateful for the laughter shared by women in the locker room after water aerobics, information gathered among the yogis in the yoga studio and oh, yoga on the beach and in the Bellair Beach Community Center overlooking the intercoastal in Florida. I am grateful that my mind still races. That I can walk up the stairs with a load of laundry. That yard work provides a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.
This, in speaking my truth, is what happens when you get your life back. More than you could have ever imagined.
Happy Thanksgiving.
There is the surprise, I'm thinking, that the life you get back can often be filled with first world stressors. Once your children were grown, gone, launched, returned and finally at least somewhat launched, the stress of the final phase of parenthood--departure--was lifted, although many have shared with me that it is difficult nigh impossible to not continue to worry about your adult children and the decisions they are making or not making and they lives they are leading and then, adding to the mix if you are so blessed, those ever amazing and wonderful and beautiful grandchildren. Because once they are on their own, the significant source of stress in your life frequently is your job. So when you retire and get your life back, there just shouldn't be any stress since you left it behind when you turned out the office lights and closed the door. Right?
Um, not so much. That's just not realistic. That's just not life, even the life you get back which, I'll poke you with this reminder, is what you wanted.
Like me.
Like me, this life is and isn't so many things. And for that I am grateful. I am grateful that each day, should I make the choice, opportunities present themselves for me to grow and embrace new learning. Each choice filled day can either nudge me forward or gently ease me into my chair in the family room. I am grateful for the family and friends, those connections which ask me to brave the wilderness, as Brene Brown says. Who remind me of the importance of integrity and authenticity. Who offer ways I might not have otherwise imagined to live my faith, to be the hands and feet and voice of Christ in the world. I am grateful for the smallest things that populate my day to day. A beautiful sunset. The convention of cardinals accompanied by the flock of robins in my daughter's backyard yesterday, shared with my granddaughter, teaching her that cardinals were people who love us who are gone and come back to see us, so say, hi, great grandma! Hi, great grandpa! Thank you for watching over us! And then seeing her return to the window to say Hi, birdies! I am grateful for the laughter shared by women in the locker room after water aerobics, information gathered among the yogis in the yoga studio and oh, yoga on the beach and in the Bellair Beach Community Center overlooking the intercoastal in Florida. I am grateful that my mind still races. That I can walk up the stairs with a load of laundry. That yard work provides a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.
This, in speaking my truth, is what happens when you get your life back. More than you could have ever imagined.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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